TORONTO, ON (TheBadgerCA) – Amid his investors filing a multi-million dollar lawsuit against him, Donald Trump today lashed out to the community in a press conference early today. Citing several windows that fell from his Toronto Trump Tower property, Trump screamed at the gathered press stating, “I’m offering $5000 to anyone that can provide the name and phone number of that piece of shit that installed the goddamn windows on my building. I don’t know who the guy is, I don’t know where he’s from, but I assume he was napping the entire time he was on the job taking my paycheques to him.
“This is fraud of the highest degree. I’m not going to stand for it. Who the hell puts windows in so they fall like that? I’m now open to lawsuits, bad press from babies in strollers getting decapitated, it’s ridiculous. Five thousand dollars. That’s what I’m offering for the name of the asshole that screwed up my windows. Wait’ll I get ahold [sic] of this guy. Until then I got to find another team to fix this. You got Mexicans up here?”