LONDON, ENGLAND (TheBadgerCA) – Continued embarrassment was the order of the day in British Prime Minister David Cameron’s camp today as 14 dead pigs have come forward with allegations of sexual misconduct at the hands of Mr. Cameron. This comes on the heels of a controversial book co-written by Michael Ashcroft, a former friend of the Prime Minister. The unauthorized biography called “Call Me Dave” chronicles the life and times of Cameron and includes tales of Cameron smoking marijuana, listening to Supertramp and other socially unacceptable behaviour. One passage details that Cameron once inserted “a private part of his anatomy” into the mouth of a dead pig during an initiation ritual for a student club.
Since news of the sexual activity with the dead pig, 14 more dead pigs have now come forward, stating that they too were assaulted by Cameron and want justice to be served. Alistair McGovern, a spokesman for the deceased pigs, stated “We cannot stand idly by and allow men like Mr. Cameron commit gross acts against dead pigs. How many pigs must come forward before we see justice served?” The 14 pigs have refused to comment, but maintain through McGovern that their stories “are consistent with the allegations from Ashcroft’s book.”
None of the dead pigs have been named and McGovern has asked that they remain anonymous at this time.