Posts Tagged ‘ #canpoli ’

Harper Selects Middle-Class Family to Sacrifice to Lucifer in Advance of Election Night

October 19, 2015
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Harper Selects Middle-Class Family to Sacrifice to Lucifer in Advance of Election Night

ABBOTSFORD, BRITISH COLUMBIA (TheBadgerCA) – The Emersons were delighted to discover today that they had been selected above thousands of middle-class families to be sacrificed by Stephen Harper to the Underworld Lord Satan in advance of Canada’s 42nd federal election. Brett Emerson, a 43-year old project manager and father of six, could barely contain his…

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Conservative Party Drafting Official List of Excuses for Why Harper Can’t Attend Ford Function

October 14, 2015
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Conservative Party Drafting Official List of Excuses for Why Harper Can’t Attend Ford Function

TORONTO, CANADA (TheBadgerCA) – Julien Code, campaign intern for the Harper campaign, dropped everything he had on his plate today when Harper’s campaign top brass demanded a list of excuses that Harper could use to get out of the rally that Rob and Doug Ford are planning Saturday. Following the inclusion of the Ford brothers…

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Area Anglophone Happy French Debate Had Nothing To Do With Him

September 25, 2015
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Area Anglophone Happy French Debate Had Nothing To Do With Him

SCARBOROUGH, ONTARIO (TheBadgerCA) – In the wake of last night’s French-language leader’s debate, Danny Illins, 34, was relieved to know that he did not have to follow a single word of it, since it was in French. Illins, a produce manager for a local grocery chain, was prepared to devote time in his busy schedule…

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